Feeling her pain

My baby dog is in pain today. Aussie is nearly 13, and being a long backed dog, she's got some arthritis in her back and hips and hind feet. Most days you wouldn't know. But Aussie has bad days.

Today is one of those bad days. She's in pain. She's having a hard time walking. Lifting her head is painful for her as well. She's not interested in her breakfast. She's shaking. All she wants to do is lie down. But due to the pain, she's lying in unusual and awkward positions. She's hiding in her kennel, trying to find comfort by hiding in her space. And she keeps coming to me, looking to me to take away her pain.

I don't know what triggers her bad days. Yesterday wasn't unusual. All I can do is give her the Rimadyl (doggie aspirin, liver flavored) and wait. Wait for the drugs to kick in. Wait for her to be herself again.

Watching her in pain makes me hurt. I can't stand it. I want to fix it, but I know I can't. It kills me that I can't make the pain go away for her. I'm dreading the day when this becomes the norm for her.

Post-Thanksgiving meal review

Well, the Detroit Lions lost horribly in their game against the Tennessee Titans. A disaster of a game. Worst loss on Thanksgiving day ever for the Lions.

Fortunately, my dinner was NOT a disaster. It was DELICIOUS. I declare this year's Thanksgiving feast a complete success! You can see before and after pictures of the Thanksgiving meal on my Flickr page.

Herb-Roasted Turkey Breast (recipe from Ina Garten)
This recipe was so easy. I bought a nice 7 pound turkey breast, bone in, and spread this delicious mix of herbs and garlic all over it and under the skin. I put it in a roasting pan, and I poured a cup of a nice pinot grigio into the bottom. Into the oven it went, and a little less than 2 hours later, it was done. It turned out juicy, was completely cooked (no undercooked poultry here!), and has an amazing flavor. I can't wait to make turkey sandwiches out of the leftovers!

As for the gravy, I used the defatted pan drippings, which had some of the delicious herbs in it, and combined them in a pan with some butter and flour. It thickened up nicely this year. I'm getting better at gravy (it takes practice just like my mom said).

Note: I don't own a roasting pan. Nor do I own a roasting rack. So I bought a small aluminum roasting pan at the grocery store, and made a snake out of some aluminum foil to create a makeshift rack on the bottom. It worked well.

Caramelized Onion and Cornbread Stuffing (recipe from Tyler Florence)
Since I was only making a turkey breast and didn't have anything to stuff, I used the option of cooking it in a baking dish instead, essentially turning stuffing into dressing. I took a hand from the store and used pre-made cornmeal muffins. The flavor of the sage was nice without being overpowering. Unfortunately, however, it turned out a bit dry. It may have baked for too long, or maybe the dish was too big so it was spread too thin. I'm not sure. With some gravy poured over it to make it moist, it tasted wonderful, so I think I'll try it again, but I'll play around with the size of the baking dish. And when I reheat it I think I'll add a touch of chicken stock.

Smashed Sweet Potatoes (recipe also from Ina Garten)
I was looking for something different this year to do with my sweet potatoes. Yes, there's something to be said for the candied ones with pecans and marshmallows. But I know I'll get those at Christmas, so I wanted something else for Thanksgiving. So I tried these.

They turned out a bit loose rather than the expected thick like mashed potatoes, but they are wonderfully spicy and not overly sweet. The orange juice in them adds some necessary acid to keep them from being sugary. Overall, I'll make these again, but next time I'll try adding an extra potato or two to give it a better consistency. These are definitely being added to my recipe file for future use.

Brussels Sprouts with Bacon and Garlic
I made these last year. They are SO GOOD. And easy. I cooked them up while the turkey rested and just wow. Nice thick cut bacon, a couple of cloves of minced garlic and lots of fresh brussels sprouts all caramelized in the pan. Just perfect. I don't think I could improve on this one if I tried my hardest, but why would I want to?

Cranberry & Wine Sauce
I got this recipe from my friends AH and DS. Yes, we have our family tradition of orange-ginger-cranberry relish, but like the sweet potatoes, I'm making that for Christmas. I actually made this the night before, to give it time to chill and gel. Take two bags of fresh cranberries, 2 cups of port wine, 2 cups of sugar, and a bunch of spices and throw it all in a pot and boil until the cranberries pop. That's it. So easy. And it turned out fantastic. I'm looking forward to putting a spoonful over my oatmeal in the morning or warming a bit and pouring it over ice cream.

As for dessert, right now I'm too full. And tomorrow is my annual Pumpkin Roll baking extravaganza. But for tonight I'm going to do the dishes and collapse on the couch for awhile.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

You can read all about my favorite holiday in last year's post. I have the same plan again this year, to stay home and make myself a feast and be grateful for a day to myself with my four legged fuzzy children. Oh, and there will be football, in keeping with the family tradition of watching the Lions as most of my family originates in Michigan. Again I'm trying a few new recipes, trying to expand my holiday dishes repertoire. And since it's just me, if they turn out terrible no one has to suffer. I'm definitely making enough to have leftovers. I'm all about the open faced turkey sandwiches.

My menu this year:

• Herb-roasted turkey breast (recipe from Ina Garten)
• Gravy (with giblets and a hard boiled egg...it's a Southern thing)
  
• Cornbread and caramelized onion dressing (recipe from Tyler Florence)
• Smashed sweet potatoes (recipe again from Ina Garten)
• Brussels sprouts sauteed with bacon and onion (did this last year - loved it!)
• Cranberry sauce (from my friends AH and DS - all spicy sweet)

I've got all the basics there, but with a few twists. Look for a review tomorrow (with pictures). In addition to cooking and relaxing today, I'll be talking to my friends and family scattered all over the planet to remind them how glad I am they are in my life and giving thanks for their unending support during this rather rough year.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Not laziness, but rather mindfulness

I had plans for the weekend. Productive plans. Things to accomplish. Good intentions to get all this extra stuff done. Lists to cross things off of.

My plans were initially waylaid by a snuggly dog and cat that made for lazy mornings. It's amazingly difficult to get up when the dog has crawled up onto the bed next to you and snuggled up close, snoring gently near your shoulder. Especially when the cat curls up on the other side of you and you can feel the gentle vibration of her purr by your knees. And there was that Saturday afternoon nap with the cat in the sun.

So my productive weekend became a lazy weekend. And I'm OK with that. I think we all need lazy weekends every now and then. Where we don't worry about the dishes in the sink, or the dust on the side table. Get the necessary stuff done, and not worry about the rest. We just pause and enjoy the moment, being mindful of where we are and what we're doing.

That mindfulness is something I'm working on. Being in the moment, and not thinking about what's coming next. Just being aware of what I'm doing at that very moment. And it's not just for when you're doing nothing, but also when you're doing anything and everything. It's kind of an active meditation. Focusing on the activity at hand and not thinking about other things. Focus on doing the dishes. Focus on cooking your dinner. Focus on walking, or the act of breathing. Don't think about what you have to do next, and after that, and after that.

It's harder than you think.

I was calling this weekend a lazy weekend, when I realized that rather than being lazy, I was mindful of each thing I did. I didn't get as much done (the to-do list is still there), but nothing I had planned to do was critical, so why was I so intent on getting all this stuff done? Instead, by being mindful of each thing I was doing, I had a wonderfully relaxing weekend. I don't feel guilty. A good chunk of my stress has melted away. So I'm no longer calling this a lazy weekend. Rather, it was a weekend of mindfulness. I got done what needed to get done, and was able to enjoy each activity. Including doing the dishes, which is my least favorite chore, AND snuggling with the pets, which is one of my favorite things ever. Mindfulness is a beautiful thing, when I can do it successfully. And this weekend is an example of success. I hope I have more days like this weekend.

More than just groceries

A few months ago, shortly after I moved to my current apartment, I went grocery shopping on a Sunday afternoon at a store a bit farther away than my "normal" store. There's nothing wrong with my neighborhood store, but it's small and doesn't have some of the specialty items I periodically need or want (for example their cereal selection is limited). So now and then I need to go to a larger store with more options. There's one grocery store in particular over near the pet supply store that I really like that has excellent variety. I combine my errands and get both dog food and people food in one trip.

The store was exceptionally busy that afternoon, and it was a rather long wait at the deli counter. People were impatient, several people cut ahead of me in line, but I was in no hurry so I just waited and decided that it was no big deal. The people behind the deli counter (a guy and a woman) were chatty, and were really pleasant with me, probably because I wasn't impatient or short with them (pleasantness begets pleasantness, you know). I didn't think anything of it.

I should have paid more attention.

About 15 minutes later, while standing in the dressing aisle trying to pick out a couple of new salad dressings (again with the excellent variety), someone walks up behind me and says: "Hey cutie-pie!" Yes, he called me cutie-pie.

I nearly jumped out of my skin. I turned around to see the guy from the deli counter. He was on break. "Hi," I stammered back once I had remembered how to breathe. Next thing I know we're engaged in conversation. I think I was too stunned to escape before he starts asking me a few questions (name, are you single, why haven't I seen you here before, etc.), continuing to call me cutie-pie throughout the conversation, and then hands me a piece of paper with his name and phone number on it and tells me to call him sometime if I would be interested in having dinner or a drink with him. He then says he has to get back to his shift and walks away.

After he left, I dawns on me what had just happened. I was picked up in the grocery store by the deli guy. He tracked me down in the store on his break to give me his phone number.

OMG. Of course nothing ever came of it because I'm not all that interested in dating right now (my life is complicated enough). And then I realized I can never shop at that store again. Dammit.

Recently I decided to tempt fate and go back to that store (I hadn't been back yet). Again, I was in the vicinity picking up pet supplies and I needed a few things. But since I didn't need anything from the deli counter, I decided to go for it and hope and pray I didn't run into him because I didn't feel like explaining myself and admittedly felt a bit guilty I didn't say "no" when it all went down. I was too startled to escape gracefully at the time. Fortunately, I didn't see him and escaped the store without incident. I don't know if I'll tempt fate a second time.

Kitchen appliance love

Anyone that has read a few posts on this blog knows that I'm a food geek. I LOVE to try new recipes and experiment in the kitchen. I'm not afraid of trying new foods. I like to play around and tweak recipes. I'm also not afraid to share recipes (just ask!). And I'm certainly not afraid to admit when something turned out not so good and should never ever be made again. I have my mother to thank for my food geekiness. She was always trying new foods, new recipes, and she asked for honest reviews of them. We had our family favorites, but more often than not we tried something new on a regular basis. I have an addiction now to trying new recipes, and my cookbook collection must be very very carefully monitored. It would take me a lifetime to try all the recipes I've clipped or emailed myself or saved over the years.

With this love of food and recipes comes a love of kitchen tools. I do subscribe to the Alton Brown school of thought that everything in your kitchen should be able to do more than one task (multitaskers) and the only unitasker in the kitchen is the fire extinguisher. So I'm pretty judicious when I choose my appliances. All the appliances I do have I actually use regularly and generally am quite fond of (some more than others). I currently own the following:

• Electric kettle
  
• Microwave (still learning to use this...I did go more than 5 years without one)
  
• Toaster (wide slot)
  
• Hand mixer
  
• Kitchenaid stand mixer (artesian) with several attachments

My most recent acquisition is a stick (or immersion) blender. I had a regular blender for years, but it never could quite do all the things I wanted it to. Trying to blend/puree hot things was tedious as you could only do small batches and it involved moving hot liquids from one container to another and back again. So mostly I used it to make hummus. I did finally cave and bought myself a stick blender. I am now in love with it. Seriously. It blends soups, sauces, smoothies, spreads, and anything else I can stick in a pot or a glass.

I used it tonight to blend up some apple-onion-acorn squash-curry soup. It's amazing how smooth and quick and easy it was to use. And the blade portion disconnects for easy washing. I'm now combing through my recipe stash to see what other recipes I have that require blending so I can play with my new kitchen toy.

Hell of a week

So that leak in my bedroom ceiling we thought was fixed? Yeah. Not so much. In fact it got worse. It was practically raining in my bedroom for several days last week. Well, maybe not a steady rain, but a constant drip. And the spots where it was dripping have expanded so now there's three. I currently have a bucket, a trash can, and a plastic bag to catch the water from the various locations. It soaked through three towels just from side drips and soaking up what was already in the carpet. I'm running out of rag towels to use as the wet ones need replacing faster than they dry. Various chunks of drywall compound have fallen down. And wet plaster/paint/drywall paper? YUCK. It's sticky and gloopy and generally a pain to clean up. Since the carpet is wet, bits of it are stuck to the fibers...I'll have to wait for things to dry out before I can vacuum up the plaster crumbs.

To make matters worse, the fallen compound revealed something more sinister: black mold (no, I haven't had it cultured so I don't know if it's the toxic variety, but I also just want it to go away so I don't have to find out). The ceiling panels are also all warped now from the weight of all that water. They aren't lining up properly anymore so there are gaps between them and they're all bowed so the ceiling looks like it has a big lump in it. There are at least three panels in the ceiling that will have to be replaced between the water damage and mold. Good times.

To add insult to injury, I woke up with a horrific earache in my right ear last Wednesday. Turns out my Eustachian tube is inflamed and the fluid can't drain and the air pressure can't equalize. So I have fluid and air trapped behind my eardrum. The good news is that it's not infected...yet. Unless the fluid drains soon, however, it can become infected. The nearest I can describe the feeling is when you're flying and the pressure in your ears won't equalize so your ear hurts and feels like it needs to "pop." I sneezed and thought my head was going to explode. And it keeps affecting my balance because my inner ear pressure is all off.

The fun just never ends around here. I believe a phrase used by a colleague best describes it: "ass circus" (thanks LR!).

My new cat

Introducing the newest member of my four legged furry family: Capri.

Pretty kitty close-up

She's a tortoiseshell, about 1 1/2 years old. The kennel Aussie goes to found her when she was around 5 months old. They spayed her, got her all the necessary shots and tests, and put her up for adoption in a cage in their main office. I saw her for the first time last May, when she was about a year old. She had been living in their office for over 6 months at that point. When she still hadn't been adopted in August, I crumbled. In mid-September I drove out to the kennel and brought Capri home. It's been 3 1/2 years since my cat Snip passed away, and when I couldn't get Capri out of my head, I knew it was time to get another cat.

It's been an adjustment. It's been over 15 years since I had a kitten in the house, for one. Fortunately, Capri likes dogs, and since Aussie was raised with my first cat, Snip (also a tortoiseshell), she accepted Capri's presence quickly. But since Capri had only lived either as a stray or in a cage in an office, she had no idea what life in a home was like. It took a good week before she'd come out of hiding in the bookshelves (that space behind the books on the bottom shelf is ideal for hiding). It took another week after that before she'd let me touch her. I've had to adjust to having my toes attacked at 2am (silly me for moving in my sleep) and training myself to watch for cat toys (I've already crushed one ball by stepping on it and almost falling in the process).

Now, two months in, Capri has made herself at home. I've learned she LOVES treats. Specifically the kind that are crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside. Catnip has no effect on her (WTF?). And she loves toys that make noise (little mice, balls that jingle, etc.). Capri is a talker, proving to be quite the mouthy cat. She's learning to like being brushed, but clipping her nails is a battle that involves wrapping her in a towel in a futile attempt at protecting myself from getting scratched.

Lounging comfortably on the back of the couch

Today we made our first trip to the vet. It took me a good 15 minutes to catch her and stuff her in the carrier. I almost had her once, but the dog decided to "help" and Capri escaped. Eventually I caught her again and we made it to the vet with minimal damage to my person (a few scratches, but nothing severe). She got all her boosters, and has been given a clean bill of health. She's also been microchipped, which I highly recommend. We'll see how long it takes her to forgive me for the injustices she suffered today.

Coming back to life

I'm still alive. Really. I know I haven't posted for two months. I was in "keep my head down and maybe I won't lose it" mode. Things have been a bit insane and until the personal earthquakes finally stopped I just focused on making it through each day.

Here's a nice summary list of the major events since July, in rough chronological order, handily organized by month.

July
*My cousin gives birth to a baby boy! Welcome to the family! My grandmother can now stop putting pressure on me about having her great-grandbabies before she dies (for some reason she was fixated on me being the one to have the babies). So thank you to my cousin. :)
*I take a long weekend and drive up to Boston, MA for a friend's wedding reception (YAY for LHK and WK!!) and to visit a good friend from grad school. Flickr pictures of the reception and my friend's garden (BF is an amazing gardener!).
*I move mid-month.
One week after moving the following events occurred:
*Visitors! My good friends LC and SB!
*Ozomatli concert! (the reason for my visitors)
*A leak appears in the ceiling in my bedroom closet, forcing me to take all the clothes I had recently unpacked and put away back out of the closet again.

August
*The leak in my closet ceiling is due to a leak in upstairs bathroom tub faucet. During repairs, the leak spreads to middle of my bedroom and rains all over the clothes I had removed from the closet to protect them. Dammit.
*Bike tires meet trolley rails. Ouch!
*Mid-month my mother arrives for a visit! YAY!!!
*One day prior to my mother's arrival, my landlord has a disagreement with the gas company and they turn off the gas service to the property. The gas powers the heat, hot water, and my stove. So now I can't shower or cook. Fortunately it's August so I don't have to worry about the heat just yet.
*My landlord replaces the gas hot water heater and my gas stove with electric appliances (note the furnace is NOT replaced at this time). I spend FIVE DAYS while they do this without hot water or the ability to cook anything. My mother suffers with me. Great visit, no?
*My mother fortunately is able to extend her visit by a few days so we can enjoy each others company once we've showered. :) She helps me finish unpacking and settling into my new apartment.
*My sister comes for a visit to attend the Nine Inch Nails concert with me!! w00t!! A truly incredible concert. We had a wonderful time hanging out together the rest of the weekend too.
*In the midst of all of this, things continue to change and move forward into an uncertain (yet encouraging) future at work. My new library school intern also started work the second week of August and I spend much of the first part of the month training her. Fortunately she's a quick study.

September
*Work is crazy. The students return and the semester begins. Additional organizational changes at work are announced.
*Mid-month I take a few days vacation that don't involve a pet emergency/drama, apartment drama, or some other drama. I enjoyed several days with no internet spending time with a really good friend just hanging out and relaxing. It was wonderful. Then I returned home and opened my email. Yikes.
*Upon returning from my [far too brief] vacation I adopted a cat to bring my total of four-legged furry children to two. Yes, a cat named Capri (pics on Flickr). And she and the dog get along just fine, thankyouverymuch.

October
*Work continues to be insanely busy.
*The month starts off badly with me getting sick with a fever for two days after getting soaked by rain.
*One of my best friends from college gets married in Louisville, KY. YAY for EH and KD!! Congrats!! KD, you are a very lucky woman as EH is an awesome guy. I'm so glad I was able to attend and had a blast at the wedding (photos I took at the event are posted here on Flickr).
*It gets cold. Since my landlords have not replaced my furnace or gotten the gas turned back on, the temperature in my apartment drops to 62 degrees, sometimes dipping a bit below that during the night. I start sleeping in my long underwear (normally reserved for camping) and wool socks.
*I get sick. Again. With the cold from hell that lays me up for nearly a week when my asthma kicks in and breathing becomes work. For several days after I start recovering I continue to sound like a husky lounge singer.
*The Phillies win the World Series! The city erupts in chaotic celebrations. Mayor Nutter reminds everyone: "You can be joyous. You cannot be a jackass." Fabulous!
*A new leak appears in the ceiling of my bedroom...this time in the middle of the room. I have to move the dog bed so plaster doesn't fall on her head.
*At the end of October I still don't have heat. After 3 workmen give estimates about what it would cost to convert to electric heat, my landlord decides to make a deal with the gas company to turn the gas back on so they can fire up the furnace. Mind you, access to the furnace for the building is through MY apartment...so each new workman means another person in my space.

November
*On Monday, Nov. 3rd, after 3 more days, a visit from the gas company to replace a meter (also in my apartment) and turn the gas back on, and visits from THREE different handymen, the furnace is finally turned back on and my apartment has heat! Just in time for a warm spell...oh well.
*The handymen on Monday kill two birds with one stone with their visit and fix the leak at the same time they get the furnace fired up! Efficiency is a beautiful thing.
*History is made and we elect Barak Obama as our next president. I am ecstatic!!

And I think that brings us to the present.